so i promised i'd write about where to find the best shoes

and so far, nary a word from me on that topic, just doom and gloom wartime commentary. in an attempt to lighten the mood, i'll begin my shoe advice. my usual favorite has been tootsi pluhound, but i have to say their buying appears to be a bit off this season. i am not seeing the beautiful costume and dries collections i am used to, instead an odd assortment of some type of shoes that look rather hand-made crafted. only have seen a very few really stellar picks. my other favorite of course is barneys warehouse sale--though it can be rather catch as catch can, best to go on the very last day, and if you are willing to go outside your normal comfort zone, i.e. black heels, you can always find some unusual finds that are quite cheep cheep, the sort that will have people asking for years afterward, where did you get those delicious little green alligator strappy numbers? other than that, i am searching for new shoe hotspots, kerquelen always good, but sometimes too pricey. who wants to pay the same price for a sandal as a boot? eew. the truth is, you can always stick with the 200 dollar rule, which is to say never pay more than 200 dolllars for a pair of shoes, boots or sandals. if you scout efficiently and are flexible to more adventurous styles you can even whittle that down to into the 100 dollar zone, or in the case of barney's warehouse on the last day, under 50. (yes i did get those navy blue corduroy laboutins for 35 dollars there).

ON HOPE:

went to a reading at bombora gallery last night. 20 or so poets and musicians gathered in a cozy basement room in chelsea, with a wood burning stove. chris stackhouse put the event together and it was one of the few gatherings i have been to in ny where people from different races mixed and listened to each other harmoniously, were interested in each other's experiences. sitting there on a wood pallet, listening to some of the most amazing talent in ny, i realized that what we were doing: speaking out, the act of reading and writing and speaking our minds, could be considered subversive very soon, the way this country is going with it's erosion of civil rights in the name of fighting terrorism. but for last night, i just reveled and relaxed in the deep, rich sustenance of freedom of expression. and remembered and tasted one of the most quintessential american things we possess, that right to read haikus about president bush, to sing about being yourself, to hear the interior lives of others--without being afraid of repercussion. truly a great thing.

you have to kind of hand it to puffy (p.diddy) for his major break into fashion with his label sean john. watching the behind the scenes with puffy on BET last night, it's obvious the man has all the elements it takes for a serious fashion takeover: a very clear vision of the lifestyle story he wants to put forth, strong opinions on every element of the show and line from hair to walks to detailing, a team of the best in the business, and a clear dedication to working hard. three years into it, he's making serious inroads into establishing himself as the next ralph lauren, using the same formula: creating a serious lifestyle look and generating major revenues from the polo shirts (in this case, seanjohn t-shirts). with revenues soaring upwards of $200 million, and accolades from the likes of hilary alexander, i'd say "go, puffy, it's your birthday!"

ON THE F TRAIN

on the F train this morning: a woman asked for the time and four of us scrambled to find our cell phone all buried deep in our bags or pockets. isn't strange no one wears a watch anymore? and my brother, who is six years younger than me, never had to learn to tell time on a regular clock because he learned on digital. oh my goodness, does it mean i am getting old because i remember when the first CD came out and we all gathered around Carla De Vecchio's dad's CD player and watched in awe as the silver disc went magically in and played Sade smooth operator. we were all entranced as we clicked throught the tracks. no more clunky mix tapes! no more high-speed dubbing!

WHAT NOT TO WEAR

what not to wear should really be named what not to watch. posing as a self-help styling show, this new reality based TV show on the learning channel takes a person whose friends nominate them to be made over (i.e. the friends say the person's style is hopeless behind their back) and then voila! two snobby stylists, a bitchy makeup artist and a medium nice (though opting for rather severe haircuts) hair stylist appear to give the person a total makeover and "teach" the person how to dress. after they "teach" the person, they send her out to shop on her own, but spy on her with hidden cameras and quickly overpower her when--jump back!--the person attempts to buy something that is, gasp! not correct!

the commentary offered by the hosts and the makeup artist (statements like: why do you want to look like a vampire with all this white pancake makeup? are de riguer) come off as just plain old mean, especially when the poor victim's face shows her absolute embrassment and hurt when being so personally attacked.

when did complete and total meaness become a substitute for provocative (and possibly interesting) banter? does all the extra bitchiness really foster more dramatic tension, arc, plot? or does it, oh my goodnes, merely show how narrow the hosts intellect actually are? at the risk of belying my innate midwesterness, do we really need any more negativity in the world at present? we've already got such a wonderful backdrop of death and destruction going on, why can't we say something nice? why can't we encourage someone who is revamping their personal style? think scintillating, not bitchy! think smart, not mean!

ON THE MERITS OF GOOD KISSING

on quite a different note, want to briefly address the merits of good kissing. had an amazing kiss on tuesday night which inspired me to discuss with my girlfriends the many merits of a good kisser. turns out most women have only had a few consistently good kissers in their lifetimes of boyfriends, which makes the merits of the good kisser stand out that much more.

and what constitutes a good kiss? for me, it's slow, slow, slow. the more langorous and lingering the better. like your kisser is kissing you from inside out.

i am going to continue to research what makes a good kiss and will post results here. i am thinking perhaps good kissing is also an appropriate antidote to the current chaos in the world. what if we all just made out? bush and saddam, condi and chirac, KIM Chong-il and ashcroft. remember: slow, long & lingering!

why am i obssessed

with shows like VH1's "driven"? could it be the neverending snow & terrorism threats here in nyc or my innate need for escapism through celebrity escapades?

watching lil' kim last night and the rise of her special brand of hardcore rap. you do have to hand it to that fierce fashionista for being as graphic as the boys and still being a little sexpot. though i do think it somewhat of a slight exaggeration when one of her cohorts claimed lil' kim was speaking about what EVERY woman in america wanted to actually talk about but was afraid to, you do have to hand it to her for successfully pulling together the dynamic elements most women are forced to usually segment in one way or another. it's very italian in a way. the idea that you can be a total sexual sexkitten and still be a force to be reckoned with.

dare i say it? you go, girl!

from the mouth of esteemed artist Sarah Hirzel:

"'stepping up' is not just a hip-hop phrase, but an actual thing you have to do to be a man."

Oh my goodness...

I am blogging.